TLV Inbox

[greatoldjohn]

[in a rather deep voice] "This is John Doe. Please leave your message. I'll get back to you as soon as I can. I may respond in text if I'm currently with Arthur. Apologies."

Now Moved To: Inbox: Act II - please tag in there!

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[greatoldjohn]

[I'm leaving a note that I'm her warden, that she has a temper at times, and...]

[ Mmm, how to put this? ]

[Do you know anything about 'substance abuse' or 'drugs'?]

[lestercraft]

...ah.

[Well there's a fact that possibly should have come out a different way.]

Yes, uh-- a 'substance' in this context, a drug, refers to, uh. A medication of some sort, often misused to achieve what's called a 'high', a-an altered state of mind, usually-- euphoria or bliss from its use, or simply intoxication. The most common form is- excessive consumption, but some drugs are deliberately created to achieve these altered states, uh. Opiates - laudanum and morphine, um, cocaine, cannabis - alcohol, particularly in excess, though in small amounts it's moderately harmless.

[Tobacco flies under his radar. It's totally fine!]

I don't doubt there's more from her time that I'm not aware of.

[greatoldjohn]

[ He'll recognize the curious silence that comes from John digesting information and, given that Arthur gave it to him, he gets quite a lot of context. Nothing personal, of course, but knowledge. ]

[And when used frequently? Or... large amounts?]

[lestercraft]

Both are- quite damaging, both immediately and over long periods. I've seen men I- I knew, as a child, quite literally drink themselves to death. Alcohol specifically can cause, uh- reduced inhibitions, aggression, poor reaction times and poor decision making, even in small amounts, but excessively it can cause nearly total loss of control over their faculties, often vomiting as the body rejects the amount they've drunk.

[greatoldjohn]

[Jesus Christ...]

[ John sounds horrified. Deeply deeply horrified. ]

[Is there any way to help them?]

[lestercraft]

That's, the, uh. That's rather the more difficult part. It's-- I'm a little surprised you're having to ask so much.

[Which is by no means an accusation, just. Noteworthy.]

The-- there's a- a drive, for these people, who have- who struggle with trying to stop drinking, or using drugs to keep seeking them out, knowing it's doing themselves irreparable harm. I'd... honestly, I'd almost call it a kind of madness.

[greatoldjohn]

[ John is quiet, the way he is when the topic has turned to something he does have experience in... but he doesn't want to get into it. He needs to, though, so he pushes through it. Arthur will recognize the cautious, low tone he uses, though. He doesn't feel good about this. ]

[Yes. A madness.

A drive towards death.

That is... the part of this all that I am... very familiar with. Though not from this perspective, obviously.]

[lestercraft]

Well, uh. Therein the contradiction lies, really. Most people turn to substances like this because they find it to be an escape. From, uh. From crueller forms of madness, I suppose. The horrors they've experienced - death, starvation, loss - for a lot of people... well. War.

[Which is a much less easy topic to broach, his hand fiddling with the corner of the ledger as he toys with the pages.]

As long as they have something in their body, the rest of the world becomes... easier to bear. Until it wears off, and you need more to get the same result.

[greatoldjohn]

[I didn't say they knew where they were headed.]

[ There's a feeling that isn't a word, isn't a movement. It's something that acknowledges the difficulty that Arthur is having, but also is... something else. Something more.

It isn't tears. Not quite. But it could be. ]

[Natalie uses them-

Has used them. To try and deal with the pain of what happened to her.]

[ A longer pause. ]

[Do you think the counseling office would have an idea of how to help her?]

[lestercraft]

I think they know, on some level.

[His own drinking had never gotten so bad. But he'd certainly felt the urge, to not stop when the first bar closed and go find the next.]

But- quite possibly, yes. I'd, uh. If you can, I'd strongly recommend finding information on it from her time, not ours. Will she be-- a-alright, with you sharing that with other people?

[greatoldjohn]

[ I asked her specifically on this topic. She...

She trusts me. And I want to do right by her.

I'd rather she get angry at me for saying something than letting anything happen to her. Especially... given the stakes. ]

[lestercraft]

Yes, uh. Yes, absolutely.

I can't imagine this is something she'd appreciate, but I imagine it would be quite possible to get the Admiral to enforce a, uh. Prohibition effect on her room, to prevent her from using any substances in there.

[greatoldjohn]

[ He's quiet for a long moment before he speaks again. ]

[ She turns to this madness not to feel the other one. And death is... less of a concern. ]

[ It's obvious that he's working it out as he talks. ]

[ I need to think on it. But thank you, Arthur. You've... given me much to think about. ] [ And, after a moment- ] [ Thank you for sharing something painful with me. I'm sorry you needed to.]

[lestercraft]

It's... it's quite alright, John.

[And he does mean it, sincerely. It's just... not the conversation he expected to have to have today.]

I have a feeling it'll be something I'll have to do quite a lot. A-and that's-- please, don't take that as anything less than my full encouragement to ask me if something does ever come up you wish to ask about. It's just...

[He lifts his hand in a vague wave.]

Something I'll have to adjust to.

[greatoldjohn]

[ John doesn't answer in words at first, just a feeling of confirmation and a short grunt. Then- ]

[ I should hope you feel comfortable in doing the same. I realize my scope of knowledge is... alien compared to most of the beings here, but it is available to you.

I don't see the need for secrets from you, Arthur. ]

[lestercraft]

Yes, o-of course. [But that feels... lacking, even if he truly means it, so he continues:] Even beyond our circumstances, John, I do put a great deal of stock in your opinions, a-and the knowledge you can bring to the table. Your insight is... unique, and that makes it truly valuable.

[greatoldjohn]

[A good thing, then, that you've got access to it at least once a day.]

[ There's a wry fondness to the words, but he won't dwell on it for too long. ]

[We should stop by the art gazebo on the way down. I've finished the beads for our kitchen and the wardrobe.]

[lestercraft]

Oh, um. Actually- [Arthur Lester put that 'I found a thread and I need to pull it' tone back right now] -while we're here, we should have a look at Miss Quigley's page as well.

[greatoldjohn]

[Ah.

That one has entries. I've read them before.]

[ There's the shuffling of pages before John speaks again. ]

[It beings with 'Not to be trusted with surveillance equipment.' And there are several notes.

Anything in particular you'd like me to look for or should I read them all? ]

[lestercraft]

Wait, h-how many constitutes all?

[Which is definitely an invitation to tell him all of them.]

[greatoldjohn]

[ The first is from someone clearly suffering delusions.

The second is from Pagan, who details that she should not be allowed to work in the infirmary, even in cases of emergency. He's very emphatic.

The third is from Iris, who admits to liking her but acknowledges that she needs to learn boundaries.

The next is from Zhao Yunlan, who notes that Misty wants to be your friend but will be manipulative towards that end. That one should be careful with information given to her, and that she can become overly fascinated with "mysteries". It also says that she is trying to be better. ]

[ A pause, then, with audible annoyance at even mentioning his name- ]

[ The last note is from Mr. Sims, the librarian. He notes that Misty can be violent when provoked, mentions a ruined shirt, and says that she's banned from the library until further notice.]

[lestercraft]

Right, so. Nothing our previous experiences with her haven't already covered, really. Though, the library ban is somewhat reassuring, actually.

[He gives a soft hum.] How have you been discussing me with her, I do have to ask. [And with a wry sort of bitterness:] I never did get that answer from her, incidentally.

[greatoldjohn]

[ There is the distinct impression Arthur might get of someone just a bit sheepish.]

[ No real specific details of our shared time together or about you. Mostly I discussed my feelings about you.

Positive ones, of course. Or largely.

When she fought with you, I admitted to her that you could be a fucking asshole when you wanted to be.]

[lestercraft]

[He rubs his face thoughtfully with his hand.]

Well, I'm starting to understand why she took such an intense interest me coming out the gate. You do wear your heart on your sleeve, John, if you spoke too fondly of me I can see her becoming curious as to whom you might be so enamoured of, especially with her own... predilections. Especially if she didn't hear that I'm a bit of a dick until after the fact.

[greatoldjohn]

[ 'Too fondly'? ]

[ John's tone questions how he could speak too fondly about Arthur.]

[...'e-enamored'?]

[ ...someone might be feeling just a tiny bit Seen and Called Out right now, sir. How dare. There's a blustery noise from within as he gains his composure again.]

[ It was during the later portions of the party. We were discussing those close to us. She told me about her team and Pagan and I told her about you. I wasn't about to lie to her in a moment like that. ]